I was talking to a friend of mine today who filed for bancrupty (because I am about to do the same) and we commented on how our parents refuse to help us out of our binds, and how we will have no more money problems when they are dead (terrible, I know, but damn true). It seems that none of my friends in our generation have cash, stocks, bonds, investments, anything stashed away. We are all just one paycheck away from being homeless. Yet, the generation before us are sitting on mounds of cash and can't understand what our problem is. I was told "You have to cut your expenses". Well, hell, I am driving on a spare tire, and two others are about to blow, I've been getting jumps on my car to start it for two days because I need a new battery, the girl scouts donated bags of food to me and my daughter because we were surviving on the nuts from the fall girl scout nut sale, I don't go anywhere on the weekends because I can't afford the gas. I don't know where else I can cut back. On my meds? Noooo, because then I will end up in an institution and we all know those cost a fortune. My wine? Noooo, that's like giving up my best friend (and besides, I buy the best stuff around for 4.99). We don't go out to eat, my daughter gets hand-me-down clothes, I live in the cheapest area I could find where we wouldn't get carjacked coming home from the grocery store, and I drive a used car getting the lowest insurance possible. I do trade to get my hair done, don't get my nails done, and don't buy myself clothes. Cut back. That's cute. So, I am facing bancruptcy. I've been in trouble before, but I didn't have a child. I can no longer take a night bartending job and move into a slummy studio. So what is a single mother to do? Unfortunately, my daughters father passed away leaving us with no death benefits, social security, or a dime in any bank account. I have no help from family and friends. So there it is. How am I making it? Well, for the past 4 1/2 years, I barely have been. I live in gratitude, pray to God everyday, and I think that's what's been helping. But I'm at the end.
I have been making money by making and selling jewelry for over 20 years. At one point, I had my collections featured in every fashion magazine, was worn by countless celebrities and even had Extra and Entertainment Tonight do stories on me. You'd think I'd have made it and have homes in 5 cities around the world. Now my website has been shut down, my etsy site has been shut down and I'm minutes away from the landlord knocking on my door with the sheriff. I spent my New Years Day crying my eyes out in despair and fear. So here we are, January 2nd 2014, and, while writing this, I am hopeful. Why? Because it's not the end. It may be the end of some things, but I promise you, it's not the end. Even though my bank account is 2,300.00 overdrawn, I have 3.00 in my wallet and every bill is overdue and all of my utilities are about to be shut off, I am hopeful.
This is the start to my New Year blog. It's not a good start to a new year, I know, but hopefully, through my trials and tribulations, I can help just one person see that when you think it's the end, it's not and to never give up hope. My situation seems impossible as i'm about to apply for homeless aid (where the county puts you up in a local motel for a short period of time). I'm going to go from a three bedroom 2 1/2 bath townhome on a golf course with a brand new kitchen, huge bedroom, garage and great neighbors to who knows what.
So, on that note, I will keep you posted (as long as I have internet), and let's see where my next adventure takes me, so, if, and hopefully you won't, ever find yourself in a similar situation, you'll know exactly what to do! Good luck my fellow single mothers, you have a friend, and you have hope!
xoxo C
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